Can you rely on chance?

Hi guys!

So as a writer I have an abundance of notebooks, I literally can’t go into a stationary shop without coming out with a fresh new cute little book of blank pages for me to fill with my many ideas. I am sure a lot of you are the same! The thing is, as I have so SO many I often fill the first few pages and then end up moving onto the next one I have just bought.

I have now banned myself from buying more aesthetically pleasing notebooks and have began to look through the ones I own. I came across this short story I wrote about three years ago, I do feel it is still very relevant to my life now and it gave me the reality check I really needed.. can any of you relate?

‘What is the chance you could win the lottery? What is the chance you could be offered a new job, your dream job in fact, while you walk your dog? What is the chance of falling over only to break your ankle and find your calling in wheelchair basketball?

Does chance actually have anything to do with it?

I have way too much time on my hands apparently. I sit, I eat and I procrastinate until it is time to sleep again. I want so much out of life but I never actually try to put anything in.

I just spilt my cup of tea while I messed about doing anything but write this short story? Well, it’s more like a diary entry if I’m honest. A diary entry straight out of my 21 year old mind to you.

My tea is still way too hot for most people but for me it isn’t hot enough. I love the way it glides along my tongue, searing the roof of my mouth until it hits the back of my throat and falls down into my stomach. The heat warms me from the inside out, it caresses my heart in the most comforting way, almost like love but never as intense.

There is a bench outside my old workplace I used to catch taxis from. The time of day was perfect to sit back and watch the world go by. To watch the bustling streets hum as the day nears the close. People rushing to get home with their child crying out as it is past dinner time, their stressed out faces complimented by the beautifully sad little person clutching their hands.

What is the chance my taxi will be here before the old dears, who has decided to sit next to me with her purse clutched at her side and her shopping scattered around her ankles, bus arrives?

Chance.

Chance.

Chance.

Nothing is to chance, really.’

As much as l love the believe everything happens for a reason, I truly know life gives out what I put in. So from this point on wards I will put everything I have into life to get the most out of it for myself and my children. 

You just need to have faith in yourself.

Ashley x

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